Self – Trust

 In Patterns & Behaviour, Self development, Success, Trust

The Importance of Trust and it’s The Impact on Our Success

What does it mean to be trusted?
Do you deserve the trust you seek?
Those questions have come up multiple times in my life, and now they’re coming up again. If I’m honest, I’m not sure that I deserve it, and maybe that very reason is why I haven’t been. The belief of being untrustworthy may be the thing that is perpetuating untrustworthiness in my perception.

Friends who know me will say that they trust me – to be a listening ear, to be present; perhaps to provide some annoyingly optimistic counsel but when it comes to the work, when it comes to the execution, I seem to always leave a lackluster experience, in my opinion. Which begs the question, if I create that for people I love, what’s going to happen for people I don’t know? How can I create an endless series of experiences for customers or an audience, when I can’t seem to get myself together now.

Maybe you felt something similar.

The history and the future of mankind

Trust is the unspoken currency with which we have bought and created our civilization. You trust the person is going to stop at the red light, you trust that your debit, credit, digital card will work when you tap, scan or swipe; you trust that the person behind the counter is going to make your coffee right and NOT slide anthrax in with the cream. Cryptocurrency, arguably the future of ALL transactions, struggled from a single point of concern: trusting strangers (pre-Blockchain).

We make these simple agreements most moments of every day. The ones who repeatedly break our trust, well, we all know the story: the relationship ends, we stop going to that cafe or bank, that person is arrested. Contrasted with the ones who consistently fulfill their agreements and are widely celebrated; the company culture that delights and serves becomes Zappos, Amazon, Salesforce, Apple (Jobs-era), the athlete who has created this iron will wins awards, becomes MVP or receives the gold; we tell our friends about that wonderful restaurant with fantastic food and even better service.

Trust and Success

Do you trust yourself?
Do you really?
Like really, really?
Do your patterns, habits, or the ways you show up, support your total and complete trust in yourself?
Are you happy in the areas of your life?

We all know we have access, we all know where to go to learn, we all know that we have the capability. We get called out more and more by those who’ve made it. I’m willing to bet, that the realest of real reasons behind why we don’t take the action we know/believe we should take, or ask the questions we should ask about our future and behaviors, is simply because we don’t trust ourselves. We all know that business is scary and it’s going to cost us money, time and energy and we don’t know what’s going to happen; it could all be for naught. That’s scary. Dedicating all those resources to be seen publically doing something that might not work is terrifying. But here’s the thing, we don’t know what’s going to happen in life, anyway. The illusion of safety in the routine is a cloak for of a completely uncontrollable universe.

So with some expectation that telling the person you like, that you like them might end in mild embarrassment, the issue becomes we don’t trust ourselves to be ok, we don’t trust that we’ll survive this uncharted future. Furthermore, since the world of deep enjoyment and fulfillment is composed of even more uncertainty and we will be responsible. For being bold/crazy enough to ask scary questions and make scary decisions; risk failing and being seen doing it and then facing the guilt of unkept promises, would anyone rational person put themselves in this line of fire?

The alchmey of thought is making something of nothing; that includes the life you want and the life you don’t want. That includes what is “real” danger and what is imagined danger. And that’s the thing – most of the things are just thoughts and feelings you have in your head. They’re a theory worth testing and the fact is, the practice of trusting yourself is worth the journey and gives us the courage to get out of our headlong to serve others by creating something.

More on this is Part II.

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The words we speak can influence our reality